Educated Stay at Home Moms
Should college educated stay at home moms stay at home or go to work? I have heard a lot about this lately and since I am a college educated mommy this is really a big deal to me.
I have heard a lot of people say that an education is a waste if you are going to stay at home and that it is a mistake. To me and I’m sure I can speak for many other moms, an education is not a waste and staying at home with your babies is certainly NOT a mistake!
I have a BA and an MBA yet I stay at home. Sometimes I jokingly say that I don’t know why I ever got my MBA because I’m a mommy but in all seriousness I know why I got it. I decided to get my MBA after my first son was born. I finished it up while staying at home with him and being pregnant with my second son. Either way, the education part and the staying at home part is my decision. I do things for myself and my family not for the world or for what “society” thinks I should do.
Also, without my education, I may have never started my online businesses. Right now my online business brings in a pretty good chunk of change. This passive income continually impresses me each day and it allows me to stay at home without really doing much work at all.
I think that if a mom has an opportunity to stay at home with her kids (educated or not) then she should if she wants to and if she feels its right for her. I have been very lucky that I have been able to stay at home. I think the most important thing (and my biggest accomplishment) I will ever do in my life is raise my two boys to be intelligent, loving, open-minded, understanding, respectful and confident young men.
So that being said, how do you all feel about this?
Should college educated stay at home moms stay at home or go to work? I have heard a lot about this lately and since I am a college educated mommy this is really a big deal to me.
I have heard a lot of people say that an education is a waste if you are going to stay at home and that it is a mistake. To me and I’m sure I can speak for many other moms, an education is not a waste and staying at home with your babies is certainly NOT a mistake!
I have a BA and an MBA yet I stay at home. Sometimes I jokingly say that I don’t know why I ever got my MBA because I’m a mommy but in all seriousness I know why I got it. I decided to get my MBA after my first son was born. I finished it up while staying at home with him and being pregnant with my second son. Either way, the education part and the staying at home part is my decision. I do things for myself and my family not for the world or for what “society” thinks I should do.
Also, without my education, I may have never started my online businesses. Right now my online business brings in a pretty good chunk of change. This passive income continually impresses me each day and it allows me to stay at home without really doing much work at all.
I think that if a mom has an opportunity to stay at home with her kids (educated or not) then she should if she wants to and if she feels its right for her. I have been very lucky that I have been able to stay at home. I think the most important thing (and my biggest accomplishment) I will ever do in my life is raise my two boys to be intelligent, loving, open-minded, understanding, respectful and confident young men.
So that being said, how do you all feel about this?
I have heard a lot of people say that an education is a waste if you are going to stay at home and that it is a mistake. To me and I’m sure I can speak for many other moms, an education is not a waste and staying at home with your babies is certainly NOT a mistake!
I have a BA and an MBA yet I stay at home. Sometimes I jokingly say that I don’t know why I ever got my MBA because I’m a mommy but in all seriousness I know why I got it. I decided to get my MBA after my first son was born. I finished it up while staying at home with him and being pregnant with my second son. Either way, the education part and the staying at home part is my decision. I do things for myself and my family not for the world or for what “society” thinks I should do.
Also, without my education, I may have never started my online businesses. Right now my online business brings in a pretty good chunk of change. This passive income continually impresses me each day and it allows me to stay at home without really doing much work at all.
I think that if a mom has an opportunity to stay at home with her kids (educated or not) then she should if she wants to and if she feels its right for her. I have been very lucky that I have been able to stay at home. I think the most important thing (and my biggest accomplishment) I will ever do in my life is raise my two boys to be intelligent, loving, open-minded, understanding, respectful and confident young men.
So that being said, how do you all feel about this?
Permalink posted by PetiteMommy at 12:36 PM
48 Comments:
I think you do whatever you can and want to do, educated or not. I think a mom is a wonderful mom either working or staying at home :)
I have a BA and I am a stay at home mom. I have heard the comment that it is a waste of education and I say psshhhaa.
Being educated makes me a better mommy in my situation (not to say uneducated mommys are not good). I use my education everyday. I read books to my child, about child rearing and try to enhance my child's life.
It is so not a waste!
chelle
I don't see how a college education can ever be a waste. That is a ridiculous statement for people to make. I don't have a college education, but I do stay home and I love it. I think that if you are able to stay home with your kids, do so!
This is such a hot button for me. Women should be able to get whatever education they want, or not. Women should be able to work outside the home or inside the home. Women should have the choice to do whatever the heck they want, period. Any other opinion, I just don't get.
Check, check... double check. I've done full time working and full time at home. I've worked part time. I actually had a choice this past summer and I chose to stay at home. It's hard but I wouldn't have it any other way. Who cares what everyone thinks?! Education is for you. Your soul. Your spirit. Not just for working or money making. It made you who you are today, which is one rad, smart mommy. :) I think you're a mom before anything else career wise. Like, if you were a CEO... I would still see you as a mom first. IT's your choice, as it is the choice of all moms, to do what is right for them.
Those who judge can go fly a kite.
Cheers,
K
P.S. I like how you're sharing more of your heart!!!!!! :) I've enjoyed it so much. :)
To each of you! Thanks for commenting!
and K, I agree. I see myself as a Mom first and then whatever else...
I have a BA in Communications and I've worked in several managerial positions when I was in my early 20s. This didn't stop me from leaving my corporate life and decide to be a WAHM. I think education of any kind is never a waste because it is put to good use in so many different (and productive) ways. I think it's great that you have thriving and succesful online businesses. A lot of women out there would envy you for having to earn passive income and still enjoying the life of a full-time mom. Consider yourself truly blessed :-)
I have a undergrad in Social Work. I definitely agree with you that women should be able to stay at home if they so desire. A college degree is never wasted. My education is also helping me in an online business that I run. I am proud to be a stay at home mom and no one can change my mind.
Hey there! I tried commenting here a few days ago but my computer went dead. You will be a great facilitator of learning for your little scally-wags.
Getting kids out of school is the best thing you can do for them (and I'm saying that now as a high school teacher!). We've looked into all sorts of alternatives like de-schooling and free-schooling and un-schooling...there's a lot of facinating information out there.
In terms of education I think of that line from "What a Wonderfull World"
"I see babies cry, I watch them grow.
They'll learn much more than I'll ever know"
We know more than our parents and our children will know way more than us. I think our role as educators and as parents isn't to "TEACH" but to "FACILITATE" or "Make Possible" learning.
Did you know that in India there are 14 different languages, and not one of them has a translation for the word "teach". This is because there isn't an existing concept of information being poured from one person into another person.
Learning is seen as something that we do all the time. Even if you're locked in a dark room, you learn what it's like to be locked in a dark room.
What we can do is point learners in the right direction. Show them the good books. Turn an interest in dinausaurs into a trip to the museum. Turn an interest in trains to a visit to a real train conductor (just call and ask).
Either way taking your kids out of an institution that looks and feels like a prison is the way to go. Your kids are too wonderful and too precious to hand them over to a cold system that dis-empowers them on a daily basis.
I wish you all the luck in the world..but then you don't need luck; you're clearly competent and then some!
"I went to school ignorant and willing to learn. I left ignorant and unwilling to learn" - Unknown
"Each one, teach one" - Bob Marley
P.S I got a trillion books on the topic if you have more time to read than I do :)
Your pal in parenting and bloggin'
John D
Staying home to raise the next generation of adults is never a mistake. There's nothing wrong with daycare but if every child in the world was raised by a daycare provider, I'm pretty sure the world would be a MUCH different place. That said, I think staying home is a choice that should be honored, not denigrated. Good for you!
im staying at home now... and i have a BS but am working on getting a licensure to teach prek-3rd grade and then will work on my masters... i enjoy being home and dont feel like it's a waste!
hi there, just letting you know that you're an inspiration to me. Can't wait to be a parent =)
Hi there- First time here...I'm a SAHM with two BAs. The decision to stay at home when my first was born was easy. There was no way I was having a kid and working outside the home all day for the money to pay someone else to watch him. As a free woman, with a great education, I've used my great, big brain to make a great decision. I raise my own kids and it's the best thing I've ever done. Work comes and goes but the kids are only little for so long...
Interesting comments, but what do people think about PhD programs which throw out women if they hear that they will "only be SAHMs". This was the case in my program. Fortunately, I didn't have to choose (got PhD at 27, before having children), had child during postdoc. Because the field in which I got my doctorate is science (dominated by men), this was acceptable to do to women...ask them to leave if they were only going to "piss away the time we spent on them" (5 to 7 years). Comments?
Not only am I a WAHM with a BA in English. But I am a SINGLE WAHM. I never thought I would find myself in this position, but here I am and I refuse to let it keep me down or force me to go out into the corporate world and leave my baby in the hands of someone else especially after her dad decided he wanted "something else." It is debatable whether I would have gone to college if I did not get a scholarship, but I took advantage of every penny and even worked on campus as a tutor for four years. My ultimate goal was always to work from home. I spent several years researching home businesses until I finally found something that is legitimate and that I can be proud of. It actually takes more effort and perseverance to start a home business, but the potential income is limitless in contrast to working for someone else. The key is to get plugged in to a group that really supports you and trains you which is what I have been blessed with and now I have a team of entrepreneurs of my own that I support. Not just WAHM's but singles, people who are about to be laid off... all types. Just because you work from home does not mean that you are shut off from the world either. On the contrary, I talk to people from all over the country every day and develop good relationships with them. People from all over the world visit my site and have an opportunity to start a business of their own and plug into my team, which is why working from home has unlimited possibilities. I would like to make it clear that having a "home-based business" and "working from home" are two different things. If you want to start a successful home-based business there will always be some kind of investment involved (usually not very much) so you cannot dismiss an opportunity as a scam simply because there is an initial investment involved. It is much better to start a home-based business and truly be your own boss than it is to "work from home" for someone else. However, there MUST be an initial investment and a commitment on your part to make it work. There are scams out there that only want your money, but they are not all scams. I commit to my team members and my success is based on their success, which is why everyone wins. Not only that, but I leverage the time and talents of others to also help support and train my team so that I can concentrate on further building my team and continuing the growth of my business. In other words, you truly can build a network of people and build a successful business from the comfort of your own home by offering whatever product or service you have. I hope this helps.
I am a stay at home mom and decided to start my owm website. sometimes you just have to do it. The site is www.thepinkflea.com and it has been a lot of work but also a lot of fun. Give it a wirl.
Currently I have a BA and no children, but I have been thinking about getting my Master's in Education. I've been so worried about whether or not this would be a waste of time and money if I just decide to stay home with children once the time comes along. Its so refreshing to hear stories of other women who are educated, even with PhD's and yet they stay home with their children. Luckily, my husband and I will be in a position where I will be able to stay at home and we won't need the second income. But I also think about my well-being and whether or not I will enjoy being home all the time. Any advice?
Do whatever you feel is right for your family. I'm a stay at home/work little bit at home PhD mom. My husband and I think that our son is fortunate to be with either one of us almost all the time. They are only little for so long so why not? If you can, you just spend a little less out there, do without a little while and then when they get back to school work while they're in school. This is what we're doing and it works great for us. Has nothing to do with education just a bit of financial acrobatics.
I think economically it can be a "waste," but education is not always a purely economic decison. Most often the negative societal impact occurs when a woman (or man) puts a significant amount of time into a highly trained field...specifically medicine, dentistry, research, and then doesn't work at all or part time, this has resulted in a shortage of doctors, dentists, and other medical/high tech professions. That said, I don't think that is a judgement someone can make for another person. If all moms didn't even graduate from college, where would we be if our husbands died, not to mention, what would our future generations look like? I think it's wonderful to have an educated person educating the next generation.
hey guys, i think you would enjoy an article on dailycents.com talking about the decrease of stay at home moms, the direct link to the article is http://blogs.dailycents.com/?p=787#comment-9062
I agree - an education is not a waste whether you use it or not. Lots of people have degrees that they don't technically use when they do work.
I heard a working mother say this: Every mom does what she does to be a better mom. For some women being a SAHM is the best mom she can be. For others, it would drive them crazy and then they would not be good moms, so they choose to work, either part time or full time.
Of course it doesn't address those who have to work because they have no choice, but, I think this is targeted more at those who do.
I stay home. I was at a Big Four accounting firm. I told my partner I was quitting and she (yes, she!) said "Don't you want your daughter to have a positive professional role model?"
I went home in tears. It had been a hard decision to make. Then that! But really, there are lots of professional role models for my daughters to see, but only one mom - so I stay home while I can. Finances may not allow it forever, but...
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I am sharing all of this with you because you are the creator of a strong and popular blog and you truly stand as a source of inspiration for women and marriages.
I would love to send you a complimentary copy of It's All About Him, in hopes that you would first enjoy the book, and secondly champion the message on your site and open up the channels of discussion. In addition, if you would like, we can send you banner ads or free copies of the book to give away on your site.
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I absolutely agree. I have my MBA as well and am so pleased to be able to stay at home. I know at times my husband thinks the money was a waste, but I don't think so. I am also doing a business from home now and am so pleased to have a great income of my own and be able to stay at home at the same time.
Sherrie
http://www.sherriesglobalcashportal.com
As a man, I think it is a waste of time and money, not to mention that women are taking up more spots in colleges at the expense of men. So, what's the deal? You get a cushy life of raising kids while your husband slaves at work all day to buy the food and cute outfits for "baby?" Kids have been raised for thousands of years by mothers with no education, so don't fool yourself and think it's necessary now.
I am an educated mom and I stay at home with my two girls.I have a 6 month old and a 2 year old. I too struggled with the quesiton of going back to work as well as a nurse. Until I came upon Ameriplan. It is a Nationwide health benefits company that offers health benefits to people at a discounted price. I work from home now and still get to raise my two little girls and bring in some extra income! It is great!! I work when I want, and how long I want, cause I now own my own business in the health industry. If you would like to know more about this opportunity to work from home please visit my web-site at www.freedomathometeam.com/jskillern, to request a phone interview with me and to learn more information. Or if you are not intersted in working and need medical benefits you can go to www.mybenefitsplus.com/jskillern. This is a great way to work from home and still raise your children, and not have to put them in day care. Which we all know is not a place for our children. This is a real home based business that will be willable. That means if something happens to you, your children will still receive your checks month after month. I knew it was a great company when I found out that places like walmart,target,HEB,Krogers,CVS,Walgreens, SEARS,JC Pennys, Lens Crafter, Pearl Vision, ect. accepted our plans. If you are wanting to generate some extra income but do not want to get back into corporate America than this is the opportunity for you!!!!
I'm working on my Bachelor's degree in Home and Family Living with a 6-month old baby. I plan to be a stay at home mom. I know that women have been raising children for "thousands of years" without degrees, but I feel like my degree will help me be more confident in my abilities as a mother, especially when the world and society in general is flooding our children with the wrong ideas. By this I mean that it is getting harder to raise children because they see values everyday that have masked the true meaning of life, and how to achieve happiness. If staying home and in my case getting an education helps me raise my children, I am more than happy to take advantage of that privilege. Plus, having an education ensures that if something were to happen to my husband, I would be able to provide for my family.
I look at my two girls 3 and 7, and teaching them about the world is not enough....I am a stay at home mom/night student and believe that I am their # 1 role model. I want them to be educated and and have careers, but I also want them to be able to have the precious opportunity to be home with their babies. You will not want to be home forever and you have your degrees! No one can take that from you and you can't get those years with your babies back....An education is never a waste of time no matter what you choose to do with your life! Be what you want your children to be!
Staying at home and raising kids is not a waste of education. I have a master’s degree in civil engineering. My education helps me be more creative and to make the right decisions in my life. My goal is to be at home for kids and help them with their everyday needs. Life is short. Kids grow up quickly and leave home. Enjoy it when you can!
Staying at home and raising kids is hard work. It is very important to have supportive friends and a spouse. The disadvantage of staying at home is the lack of adult communication. I am a part time student. It helps me learn about what I like and to meet people with the same interest.
First, I absolutely, 100%, undeniably believe that a woman with a college education is better off whether she has children or not. There are those lucky and talented few that are able to make their fortunes without a degree, but it's such a gamble.
Second, what happens if tragedy hits the family and the content stay at home mom is no longer able to stay at home? These are hard times. Death of a spouse or forclosure or a number of other undesirable situations may pop it's head at any moment! A woman who got her college degree will be in a whole lot better shape than a woman who discarded school because she wouldn't ever use the degree.
I am a sahm with a BA in English. I look at it this way. Does a person earn a degree in order to become an educated person or just to earn money? An education is worth everything if you want to be a good mother. I have 3 little ones and I definitely want to provide a good example to them by making the most of myself. Plus you never know what those little ones are going to ask or do. Education can only help!
(http://sahmsisters.blogspot.com/)
I have a BA also and I just quit my corporate job to stay at home with my daughter. I also have an online business. I'm the happiest I've ever been and I don't think it's a waste of my education. If anything staying at home is the best investment in my daughter's future.
I agree with all of you who made the statement that a college education is never a waste of time. Although it may seem not as useful if you are a stay at home mom, it could eventually help with duties that a stay at home mom deal with, whether it be starting your own online business like the blogger or helping your kids with your homework and setting a good example for them. I think the task of being a stay at home mom is already so large, seeing as how you're faced with the challenge of taking care of both the house and the family, that if you have the time to get a college degree AFTER having a baby,you should definitely be applauded, not criticized. Every family life is different. My mother was a stay at home mom in my eyes because when looking back at my childhood, I always remember her being in it, however, she managed to continue running a business with my dad and taking care of not just me, but my 2 siblings and an elderly grandparent. No one should judge a mother's choice to work, stay at home, go to school or do a combination of the three, because the truth of the matter is no one knows the truth of the family!
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You've got it right! Every stay-at-home mom I know (myself included) has a college degree - and many with graduate degrees. Staying home with your children is an amazing opportunity, not just the precious time with your kids, but for growing yourself.
My girlfriends and I talk about how this time at home can even be a spring board for the next phase... re-entering the work force the way you truly want to, and on your own terms.
We live in a big city. I have a MA and was pursuing PhD when I got pregnant. I quit the study partly due to challenging pregnancy. I stayed on part-time with the nonprofit I was working for, working from home, until my son turned 3. Now I am a full-time stay at home mom with no income under my name.
Education as a tool to earn higher income is a product of 20th century materialistic American thinking. As a consequence, many college courses as well as graduate courses in the U.S. look very much like extended professional schools, and many students are not trained critical thinking and logics. It's high time that we take a good look at our society where a person's worth is measured in income and assets. The economic crisis as well as many other pressing social issues shows that we really need to change the way we think about way of life.
As an educated parent, I don't see any reason why I should leave my child to someone else. With my level of education, I am just as qualified, if not more, than those working in daycare, preschool, and kindergarten. I am grateful that we have learned to live on my husband's income, though he doesn't have a bachelor's degree. The lack of second income has not kept me from providing my son quality education available out there. Time is money, and I have that precious time to be creative and to organize our way of life according to our beliefs, values, and principles.
I was never a stay-home advocate, and I intended to keep my "career". But now that I stay home to raise my son, I can truly say that I've learned so much and grown as a person in a way I would never have in the pursuit of Ph.D. and career. Stay-home mom is truly more than a full-time job, and has been far more challenging than any jobs I've had or study I've done. I am involved in our community and in the society far more intimately than when I was working, and I feel more empowered in some ways to help transform the society. Social transformation begins with one life at a time, and for me, it starts with me and my family.
I'm a stay at home mom but I still help pay the bills. In the little free time I get. I go to http://cashcrate.com/996129 . Every little bit helps in these tough times. Its nice to get a check for doing surveys etc when you have time.
Great Responses from everyone. And I agree. An education is never a waste.
Chris
http://www.chatterscene.com
A message board for woman
It is so strange in our society, how we fight to have rights, and equal choices, but then if CHOOSE to stay at home, for some reason, that choice is not as accepted as working. I don't care what you do, the more educated you are, the better off you will be, and the better off your kids will be.
I'm a stay-at-home mom by choice and I worked hard to earn a bachelors degree, Special Education endorsement, and a masters in counseling. I have 10 month old twin boys and I choose to stay home, raise them with our values and standards and hopefully prepare them socially, emotionally, physically, and cognitively for public education in the future. They're MY boys, I don't want someone else raising them and teaching them inappropriate behaviors or their values and not mine. As their parent, we (Dad & I) have the responsibility to teach them what's wrong and right. I honor and cherish my time at home with my boys, as the time with our children goes by so quickly. Helping our children be all that they can be, that's our goal, right?! It's mine for sure. :)
Kudos to you! Those who think it's a "waste" for you to be an educated stay at home mom must not realize what an impact you are having on the lives of your children.
Yes, the first 5 years of a child's life they develop their personality, value system, build trust and security in their relationships, bond with adults, and learn manners and work ethics. The first 5 years of a childs life are their greatest development in their brain and who they are as a person. Amazing isn't it?! To trust them with a Daycare or anyone other than their parents is not right to me. Yes, we make huge financial sacrifices so that I can be home with my boys, but hopefully they will become kind, respectable, hard working, intelligent and loving little men. I need to invest the time now, so that they have the best chance of reaching their full potential. We made the choice to have these little guys and we also make the choice to raise them. Thanks for your support. :) Oddly enough, women who read these blogs are at-home Moms who feel the same way I do, so I'm preaching to the choir. :) I'm glad we're here for our children, here-here ladies! :)
An educated stay at home - what a great thing for your kids! Cheers to you!
An educated stay at home mom who is dedicated to providing all that her children need to meet their full potential. To me, that means to be here for my boys, teach them and guide them along the way. I didn't say, "give them everything they want," I said, "be there for my boys." I will give them what I think is helpful for the complete development, but 'things' are not what they need as much as my time, love, and dedication to them. These little guys are my world, they make me a better person and I owe it to them to be their 'teacher & mentor,' in other words, their mom. :)
I am also a college graduate and have recently found myself laid off from my job. I think that I would be perfectly content staying at home know even though my children are not babies anymore if I could just figure out how to make a good passive income like I hear others like yourself talk about. If anyone reads this and can help me please feel free I am willing to try.
I just got my BA in English...I went to school part-time for 7.5 years, while having 2 children (ages 5 and 2). Now I am going to start grad school! Many people think it is a waste for me to stay home, but I am getting degrees while being a SAHM so when I go to work I will be able to actually make decent money and help my husband out.
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