We got back home from our vacation early this morning and you know what I realized, I realized that I enjoyed being absent from blogging and from my computer immensely. I enjoyed being disconnected so much that I wish I never had to do this again. Well, not really, but sometimes blogging’s just not fun when I have to force myself to think of something to write about during the week. I’m sure everyone knows what I’m talking about.

We had a wonderful time at the beach and this was the best early birthday present I could have asked for. We spent alot of time talking about where we wanted to live in the next few years, what we wanted to do and the possibility of adding to our family during our 10 hour trip there and 10 hour trip back.

Yes, you heard that right even though you’ve heard me say a thousand times that I didn’t want to have any more kids BUT I can’t get rid of this feeling inside of wanting another child to make our family complete. Maybe that feeling will pass or maybe it wont. All I know is that this time there will be a plan or atleast a plan for a plan… I keep going back and forth with what I want and how I feel and fear is the biggest issue. A part of me just wants this feeling to go away completely and make me feel the way I felt a week ago never wanting anymore kids so that I don’t even have to worry about it. You just don’t know how much this feeling has consumed me.

Anyway, this is it for now. I’ll share some photos of our trip tomorow on flickr.